Reflecting on this, as a mom of five, I see motherhood as a privilege. I see it as a blessing. But I also see it as a huge responsibility.

Motherhood has left me with scars.

Not just the biological scars. Not just the physical scars. There are scars that motherhood has left on me that perhaps only I know about—and some only you know about.

Science gives us a beautiful picture of just how deeply motherhood can mark a woman.

There is a phenomenon called fetomaternal microchimerism, where cells are exchanged between a mother and her baby during pregnancy. Fetal cells can cross into the mother's body and some of those cells can remain in her tissues for years, even decades, after pregnancy. Maternal cells can also cross into the developing baby. So, in a very real biological sense, pregnancy can leave a lasting cellular imprint.

And I find that profound. Because motherhood marks you. It marks you physically, psychologically, emotionally. And, for those of us who understand motherhood through the lens of faith, it marks you spiritually. So whether you birth your babies naturally or through Caesarean section, the experience of motherhood is not something you simply pass through and walk away from unchanged.

Knowing this, the truth is that we cannot afford to be casual about the office and the vocation of motherhood.

We cannot.

Because what has been placed in our hands is not a trophy, not a statement of class, not a competition.

These are lives that have been bequeathed to us with the honourable, noble, but also weighty responsibility of raising and nurturing them into stature—physically, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually. And so, to treat motherhood as a competition, to treat it as a statement of class, to assume that because our children have certain privileges we have automatically fulfilled the responsibilities of motherhood, is, to me, a misalignment of priorities.

Yes, pack their lunchboxes.

But while you pack their lunchboxes, be sure that they are also being fed with the Scriptures.

While you get them the best school wears and food wares, be sure that you are steeping their destinies in prophecy and prayers.

While you take them to school, to after-school games and extracurricular activities, be sure that you are forging character and forming values in them.

Really, motherhood is more spiritual than stereotypical.

Regardless of what society tells us, the ability of a woman to shape the trajectory of her children physically, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually cannot be overestimated. But many times, mothers and women of this generation are carried away by the myriads of other activities that demand our attention.

And I understand it.

We are building careers or building businesses. And somehow, we have to hold all of these things together. The added burden of career and motherhood is something that every mother has to be intentional about. And so, one of the prayers I often pray for myself is that I will not sacrifice marriage and motherhood for medicine and vice versa.

I don't know what the equivalent of that prayer is for you. Perhaps it is that you will not sacrifice marriage and motherhood on the altar of the marketplace, ministry or media. Whatever God has called you to.

Dear mothers, birthing a baby is only one step. And if this experience has marked you so permanently—hopefully for the positive—then we must ask ourselves what we are doing with these lives after they have been placed in our hands. Because for some people, the marking was not positive. Some women sadly lost their lives in the process of birthing a baby. Some live with permanent complications of childbirth.

If bringing a child into the world can leave such an imprint, then the onus is on us to recognise the magnitude of what has been entrusted to us. Beyond birthing their bodies, their souls and their spirits have to be well stewarded. And this is only possible by God. It is only possible by grace.

There have been many matriarchs of old who raised generals in their own right. Women who understood that what was in their hands was bigger than the child they could see. Women who understood that they were not merely raising children. They were raising generations. And I believe this is God's intention and agenda for every woman and every mother.

That we would understand the office.

That we would respect the assignment.

That we would steward the responsibility.

So, as you invest time in everything else you do, invest as much time—and I dare say, much more—in prayer.

Because motherhood is not merely about producing children. It is about shaping destinies with the help of God. My earnest prayer is that we will step into this office with full maturity, full understanding and full consciousness of the essence of what we have been entrusted with.

 

 

 

A LITTLE ABOUT ME

I am Dr Anthonia Soje a physician, hospital administrator, entrepreneur, psychotrauma-informed therapist, transformational life coach and strategist, Christian marriage and sexuality coach, educator, author, and speaker.

My work sits at the intersection of medicine, psychology, healing, relationships, faith, personal growth, and intentional living.

I am deeply interested in helping people understand themselves, heal what needs healing, gain clarity about their lives, and become more intentional about the lives they are building.

And beyond all the professional titles, I am simply a wife, a mother, and a Christian—still learning, growing, and becoming.

This is the lens through which I write.